My eighth grader is on the JV baseball team this year, and like many young athletes, he’s spending more time on the bench than he’d like. Our small school has enough talented players to fill three teams, and while I’m incredibly proud of him for making the JV team in 8th grade, it’s tough watching him sit when I know how much he loves the game.

As much as we want our kids to succeed on the field, sports offer something even greater—lessons that shape them into strong, resilient young men. Here are my biggest takeaways from this season so far.

We Are Raising Men, Not Just Ballplayers

Don’t get me wrong—I love watching my kids play, and I want them to excel. But at the end of the day, their character matters more than their playing time. We refuse to bash coaches or criticize teammates who are getting more playing time. My son plays first base, and there’s a very talented ninth grader ahead of him. His time will come, but he has to wait his turn. Life will present this lesson over and over: work hard, be patient, and stay ready. This season does not define who he is—he is so much more than a baseball player.

It Takes a Village, and Coaches Are Part of It

I’m incredibly grateful for the coaches who have poured into my son over the years. They have helped shape him into the person he is becoming. Too often, I see parents complaining about coaching decisions, but I just don’t get it. If you don’t want your child playing under a certain coach, then don’t be on the team. Coaches are not meant to be our kids’ buddies—they are there to lead, challenge, and teach. When I played sports, I was a little scared of my coaches, and that wasn’t a bad thing. Today, too many parents expect coaches to explain every decision. But part of growing up is learning to accept authority, even when it’s hard.

Would You Rather Watch the Game from the Bleachers or the Dugout?

Wearing that jersey is a privilege, whether you’re starting or sitting. Being on the team means you get to spend five days a week with your best friends, doing what you love. The inside jokes, the locker room banter, the bus rides, the dugout camaraderie—those are the things you’ll remember long after the season ends. Don’t waste this time sulking about playing minutes. Enjoy the experience for what it is.

Life Goes On After High School

I was a high school athlete myself—volleyball, softball, and even one year of basketball. Someone recently reminded me of a playoff game my senior year. The last game for our senior class. We were about to win, just one out away, when our pitcher overthrew me at first base, costing us the game. You’d think I’d remember that moment, but I don’t. I’m sure it was hard at the time, but life goes on. So much has happened since high school. I made great memories in those 4 years. I have no regrets. But I am so glad I am not still holding on to some missed opportunity in high school. I hope my kids enjoy every stage as it comes. High school sports can be a very fun stage of life but the fun does not end there. 

Heaven Is Our Home

This might seem out of place to some, but it shouldn’t be for Christians. At the end of the day, our ultimate home is in heaven. Our time on earth—and on the ball field—is just a fleeting moment compared to eternity. Keep your eyes on the real prize, kid. Walk by faith, trust God, and know that even on the bench, He is shaping you in ways you may not yet understand.

Sports are an incredible gift, but they are not everything. The lessons my son is learning this season—perseverance, patience, humility, and faith—will last far beyond the final inning. And in the grand scheme of things, that’s what truly matters. I hope our family can keep this perspective as the seasons go by. 

Colossians 3:23:

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.

James 1:2-4:

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Jeremiah 29:11:

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope.

As parents, our worst nightmare is seeing our child in distress and not being able to help. When that happens, we turn to medical professionals, trusting that they will provide the care our child needs. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. If you ever find yourself in a similar situation, this is what we learned—and what we wish we had known sooner.

Our Experience

Recently, our son developed the flu and experienced a high fever ranging from 102.5 to 104.5 for several days. Alongside that, he suffered from severe insomnia, going for at least four nights without proper sleep. He began experiencing an altered mental state, including delusions, auditory hallucinations, paranoia, and anxiety.

He was scared. We were scared. We knew something wasn’t right.

When we brought him to our local ER, Self Regional Hospital, we expected a thorough evaluation and treatment plan that addressed his full range of symptoms. Instead, we encountered dismissiveness and a focus on protocols that didn’t seem to apply to his condition. As parents, we suspected a rare post-viral effect impacting his neurological state, with the primary concern being his severe insomnia. However, our concerns were largely brushed aside.

What Went Wrong

• A Misunderstood Request: When I said, “I want something to sedate him,” I meant that he needed help sleeping to reduce his anxiety and paranoia—not heavy sedation. I used the wrong word, but as a parent, I relied on medical professionals to understand the root of the issue and recommend the best course of action. Instead, I was given a lecture on how dangerous it is to sedate someone.
• Lack of Consideration for His Medical History: Our son has two brain abnormalities—Craniosynostosis and Dysgenesis of the Corpus Callosum. Seizures were a concern, but when I brought this up, it was dismissed rather than explored further.
• Missed Treatment Opportunities: His labs showed dehydration and a sinus infection, yet these conditions were not addressed. We expressed concerns about him having Post Viral Syndrome. That was also dismissed.
• Escalation Instead of Collaboration: Rather than listening to us as parents and working together to find a solution, the approach taken made us feel like adversaries instead of partners in our son’s care. At one point, I was even threatened with removal from the hospital for calmly advocating for my child.
• Premature Assumptions and Unnecessary Fear: The medical staff repeatedly mentioned that he was going to a youth facility after the morning psych evaluation. This was said without a full understanding of his condition and should never have been assumed or discussed prematurely.
• Unclear and Unexplained Protocols: At no point were the hospital’s protocol rules explained to us, yet we were constantly being corrected and reprimanded for things we didn’t even know we were doing wrong. Instead of guidance, we were met with frustration and criticism, adding unnecessary stress to an already overwhelming situation.

The Outcome

Thankfully, the morning doctor took a different approach. He explained the lab results, made a referral to a pediatric neurologist, and suggested testing for PANDAS (a condition that can cause neuropsychiatric symptoms following an infection). This was the information and guidance we had been desperately seeking.

What We Learned

If your child is experiencing neurological or psychiatric symptoms following an illness, and you feel that your concerns are not being taken seriously, here are a few steps we recommend:

1. Know Where to Go: If we could do it over, we would have bypassed our local hospital and gone straight to Greenville, where pediatric specialists are more equipped to handle complex cases.
2. Be Cautious About Medical Terminology: Avoid mentioning potential self-harm unless it is the primary reason for your visit. Miscommunication can lead to unnecessary interventions that may not align with your child’s actual medical needs.
3. Trust Your Parental Instincts: No one knows your child better than you do. If you feel something is being overlooked, speak up—again and again, if necessary. I also suggest parents look up PANDAS /PANS. These are not very well-known medical conditions.

Gratitude Where It’s Due

While our initial experience was frustrating, we are grateful to the morning shift doctor, Dr. Taylor, for his professionalism, thorough explanation, and willingness to take our concerns seriously. His approach provided the answers and action plan we had been seeking from the start.

Final Thoughts

Emergency room visits can be overwhelming, especially when your child is in crisis. Our experience taught us the importance of knowing where to go for the best care and how to advocate effectively in a high-stress medical setting. If you ever find yourself in a similar situation, we hope our story helps you navigate it with more confidence and clarity.

Your child deserves the right care—and as parents, you have the right to demand it.

Benjamin Jr. also wrote a blog post from his perspective. You can read it here