(Still Not) Helping us Name our Baby. Part 3.

Welcome to the second-to-last installment of our fun little weekly exercise.  This week we are going to go over a few more not-so-advisable names I’ve come across in our quest to name our next child something, um, biblical.

Withoust taking up any more time, it’s week three of “Just because it’s in the Bible doesn’t mean you should go with it.” This time around I’ve switched over to searching the boy’s names.  All of the names presented in this series appear via the same misguided baby-naming website.

Abaddon: This seems like a strong name.  Lots of hard consonants, and whatnot.  And it is a strong name.  So strong that in the Bible it’s one of the names used to refer to hell. (Psalm 88:11, Proverbs 15:11)  Literally translated it means “destruction, or what a two-year-old bear cub might do in a porcelain doll shop.”  If you are looking to raise a world-class Mixed Martial Artist, this could be your ticket to making that happen.  I’d go with the middle name “Liddell” or “Bruiser.”

Barabbas: There are several reasons why I think we’ll avoid this name for our next boy.  First of all, it immediately brings to mind the notorious murderer who was released instead of Jesus.  That’s not so bad, given that all of us are guilty and let off the hook by Jesus.  What makes this a name that I am not a fan of is that it essentially means “Son of a man.”  And I think that much should be understood, as opposed to pointed out.  Neat insights regarding how such a general name was given to the man who was released for Jesus aside, I don’t think naming my boy “Kid with a dad” is going to fly.  Other names I am going to avoid are “son of a woman,””amphibious frog” or “overly-nice Mormon.”  It’s just redundant.

Pekod: This is a boy’s name suggested by my now-favorite baby-naming website.  It means “visit”  which sounds cool until you hear it in the sentence “The Lord visited them with destruction and punishment…” which is precisely how some commentators understand this word in the context of scripture.  I’m not sure I want to name my child something that may indicate to him that I think God is punishing me by his very presence.  But, then again, it would give him some great things to tell his counselor later in life, or some good stand-up material.

Dodo: Sometimes when perusing baby naming websites, you might start with the meaning first, and then look at the actual name itself.  That’s what I hope has happened in the event you meet a little boy named Dodo.  His name means (in ancient culture) “Beloved of the LORD; Jehovah is Loving. His Beloved.”  What an honorable, God-exalting name.  However, in the contemporary vernacular, it translates roughly to “my parents hate me and want to create an entire new sub-genre of playground insults.”  That’s about the only reason I could see naming your boy “Dodo.”

That’s all for this week.  Next week we’ll put this ailing blog-series out of it’s misery when we round out the last set of potential boy’s names.  What names am I missing?  Comment below.